Knock on wood

Let's go back to The House That May One Day Be. We're closer and closer, but I am not allowed to state anything definitive about it until the potential owners have keys in hand. I jinx things. It is the opposite of the Midas touch. Like last Friday I signed a purchase agreement for my house, and today I signed a cancellation for same said purchase agreement. I am Suzanne.

 

This house needs some love. My peeps saw the house, and felt that they had the love to put in to the house, at a price that would allow them to love it a pretty good amount and buy some furniture. Not "new counters and backsplash before we move in" kind of love, but "let's bring a man with a paint sprayer in here to get this freshened up a bit." Also something about leveling the yard, which makes its own swimming pool when it rains.

 

Because, THTMODB clearly has a good foundation. Good bones. A lot of things we can work on to make it the Ronald Miller of houses. But this

 

 

will absolutely not do. So much paneling. Oy vey. Yellow double ovens and a yellow hood with a black stove top (OLD) and a newish black fridge. Scallop under the upper cabinets. Wood grain Formica. Even with paint, these cabinet doors will eventually need replacing to modernize the house. Taboo to talk about resale before this sale? Maybe? But I'm also working with someone who loves a budget.

 

 

Yes, thank you for the gift of built-ins that will hold the dishes and tchotchkes they do not own. So much cabinet space I could twirl in circles on a hilltop bursting with song like Julie Andrews. My cup runeth over with this ample storage! But do my painting people know how many layers of stain-blocking primer have to be applied to every nook and cranny of this cabinetry to make it white?

 

 

We love an open, charming second foyer with additional built-ins, large framed openings, and tucked away little wet bar. We do not love the floor, but we can live with it for now. I'm pitching whitewashed woodlook tile in the kitchens and bathrooms, and bamboo flooring through the rest of the house. Also, the underside of every upper cabinet has that scalloped woodwork, and that has got to go. Screams "decades long ago!"

 

 

We also do not appreciate paneling the bejesus out of all the flat vertical surfaces on half the house, but we are willing to work with it. Seriously y'all, one half of the house is paneling and laminate floor and one half of the house is carpeted with tan trim. Bipolar home.

 

Accepting appointments with professional men with paint sprayers, endless rolls of plastic and painters tape, and giant buckets of not-white, not-cream paint.

 

Because I think if THTMODB, will be cooperative and take paint on ALL THESE STAINED WOOD AND PANELED SURFACES, the new family will love it unconditionally. After that.

 

Down the long paneled hall that leads to the garage, we'd need to do white on the paneling and a light color down the hall, because no natural light.



From The Inspired Room.

The potential owners want a gray marble countertop with a white subway backsplash. I fully intend to live out my dream of light upper cabinets are dark lower cabinets through these owners.

 

Also from The Inspired Room.

Because sharp and sophisticated with room to not be too modern. She's a cottage-y girl. He's a functional boy. It's a delicate balance.

 

The built-ins in the dining room can be painted dark and light with marble and tile like the kitchen cabinetry. Or they could be the light color of the upper cabinets with a butcher block counter and a beverage cooler and ice maker for entertaining.

 

From some random place on Houzz.

Veranda magazine. No link.

We could put some stank on the built-ins in the foyer with a bold back paint, wallpaper or stencil.

 

From Karen Davis Designs.

Fingers crossed, next week they close on the house, and I can tell you it's "ours" and "we" got it! But I somehow jinxed the sale of my own house this week, so mum's the word.

You know what else is the word? Or not the word? Masonite siding. It's a life ruiner, dream killer. You know when the right time to say that word with "not" in front of it is? When someone is buying a house with that on it. Brick people. All brick, all the time for me for the rest of my life.