Tuesday Evening: A Photo Essay

This is a completely gratuitous post about my children climbing trees and "playing" football. I was hormonal and feeling sentimental about The New Normal Life of Jake and Landen.

So, Tuesdays are not fun. The boys come through the door a little before four. This is usually the time of my work day that is the most productive, for various reasons. They grab a snack. We spread out across the dining table to do their homework, continue my workwork. Landen has football practice on Tuesday evenings at the LSU parade grounds. This was the last day I will sit in my car for 90 minutes while Landen practices and Jake climbs trees. I intend for Corey to come straight to practice from work on Tuesdays, so that I can come home and get ready to feed everyone before 8 PM.

It was so beautiful outside Tuesday evening though. I was able to sit in my car with the windows rolled down, watching the tree-climbing and football-practicing of my boys.

Yes, that is a real honest-to-God Army PT shirt, complete with reflective letters, that Jake is wearing. They both have shorts to match, but they are a little short for public outings. This is what happens when he dresses himself. He wears a heather gray t-shirt and a pair of grey on grey houndstooth cargo shorts that do not really fit him.

I can already tell that football is going to be a riot. Their coach keeps asking them to cut down on the "silliness" at practice. There is one kid who dances all the time. I've already been informed by Landen that he is not wearing the correct practice clothes, so I dispatched Corey to buy him some mesh shorts, and now he wants to wear them 24/7. These picturs are pre-cool shorts.

This is my favorite picture. He made it through all those kids too. I have no idea what they are going to have him playing on Saturday. He's not the slowest runner, but he's not the fastest runner. The fastest runner is this teensy-tinsy kid who I'm starting to call The Flash. He's spritely.

Jake perches in various trees to get the bird's eye view of the practice. At one point Landen had the whole team distracted from football to stare at Jake and then all turn to me and tell me my child is stuck in the tree. He's not stuck. He got himself up there. He makes sure he can get himself down. LSU students walk by him and ask if he needs help, and he politely declines. Please note how many feet are between the bottoms of his feet and the tops of the SUVs parked below him.

Sports trivia: You are not allowed to touch the other players with your hands in flag football, unless it is to reach out and grab their flag. Is this YMCA rules? Anyway, the kids practice blocking with their hands behind their backs.

And mine in particular would rather use his hands to pick up pieces of grass and put them in his mouth like he's seen cowboys and ranch hands do on TV.

This is going to make a mighty fine framed photo for a female admirer one day. For my first Valentine's day with a boy ever, in third grade, he gave me a framed photo of himself leaning against a tree in a red turtleneck. I know exactly where in my parents' house that framed photo lives.

Right now I will not make you bored or uncomfortable by talking about how cute Landen's little tush is, and how I know when he gets in high school all the girls are going to go crazy for how fiiiiiiiine his butt looks when he dresses up and wears khaki pants to dances and band concerts....because that's what I did when I first saw his dad when I was fourteen years old.

Seriously, son? Do you really need to DROP out of a tree like that?

The first game is Saturday at noon. Baby Jesus loves me because he's not making me set an alarm or wake up early for flag football this year, knowing that my Saturday sleep-lates are precious to me. We also have to get haircuts this weekend, because this school does not let you get away with shit and they are going to send me a uniform violation notice for these kids any day now. We're off to see Grace at the mall after Saturday vigil mass tomorrow night. Corey has drill all weekend, so it's just me handling everything by myself as a punishment for not being home two nights a week us.

Oh, and then he's out of town Tuesday through Friday. I sent Cydney the Dates She Would Be Living At My House a month ago, so she could clear her schedule. This is a two-adult household. We're accepting applications for a permanent stand-in adult.